I had grief group last night.
I love that place...but last night I hated it.
I hated it because I sat there looking at those sad people...thinking I didn't want to ever be one of "those" people...wait...I AM ONE of "those" people.
In my group, I think I am the most "removed" from my death...to me meaning that I am the one who's said death happened the longest ago. Mine is 8 years...some are as little as two months. We are a large range. I am there for different reasons that some of the others, but then again...we are all there for the same reasons too. I don't look at myself as a "tragedy case". There is always someone worse off. I have had two immediate family member deaths and my fair share of extended family as well. I have grown from them, learned from them, and now embrace them. They have made me who I am today...still causing some weakness though. I wouldn't trade my deaths for anything of the things I just mentioned...but it is what it is...this is what I have been handed...and I CAN HANDLE IT! I think...
I like to go to know I am not alone...
Last night I had a reality...I mean I have definitely thought about this before...but last night it head me in the face...HARD.
One of my fellow grievers is a widow now. His precious wife passed away. He is so young and she was so young. I can't imagine loving someone so much and then their lives being taken away in a split second. I do not want to be him...but I don't know what the future holds. I have faith it will treat me well...afterall, I have had my share plus some! THE ONLY thing I can do about this...is live life to the fullest. Tell everyone how much they mean to me anytime I can.
I found this quote that goes perfectly with this post.
"We live as long as we are remembered..."